2.4 KiB
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Doesn’t think it’s all my fault
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Thinks I was interrupting when she was talking to Charlie in the living room
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She didn’t me say I was advocating for Charlie
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Would have liked to hear what I had to say just not at that time
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Wish what she was going through had been considered more
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She was just trying to talk to me about the conversation I started
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Thinks she messed up this as well (self deprecating)
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Doesn’t want me to reiterate it
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Energy I came out with was a lot
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She was sad and upset and didn’t need to attend to that
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She needed to be cared for for a bit
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Slapped kicked bit today and last thing she wants is to go through mental gymnastics with me
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She has acknowledged she messed up and clarifying questions she asked came across poorly
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The way I treated her upstairs in the convo was not ok
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I said I didn’t want to talk about it anymore but she doesn’t know what to do
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But then I come in her space and do this
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Requiring her to put more mental energy into me
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She needed to feel cared for and emotionally cared for today
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She pushed away because of the way I was treating her
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It’s not that I don’t deserve to to feel comforted and loved like she is asking for now
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She doesn’t remember conversations about letting me know she can’t be there for me because of how she was feeling towards me
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Didn’t seem like a safe space to let me know she wasn’t ok
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She was feeling mistreated by me
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She was letting me know she was looking for comfort and had a shit awful day
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Said this when she came down asking if I wanted to do clay before talking about
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Wants me to see she is hurting and be there for her
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The expectation I set out if she could let me know but she could not and I didn’t make her feel safe
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She was looking earlier for comfort but no longer after the way she was made to feel
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It’s ok to step back bc she doesn’t feel safe with me
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It’s ok for her to not talk to me bc she doesn’t feel safe with what I would say to her
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About halfway through something shifted and I was picking at things she was saying and she didn’t feel safe
Action item
- Dig deeper when things are not successful to be there for her when she is feeling upset
- Don’t bring this energy to her when she is sad and upset
Wtf is this shit
- Energy I came out with was a lot
- I forced myself out here