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docs/projects/memorypalace/Christina/Feelings Conversations/Christina feelings - march 18 2025.md

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+- [ ] She is sad and hurt how I looked at and talked to her in my office last night
+- [ ] She knocked I turned and had said yes
+- [ ] To her it seemed that I was able to talk
+- [ ] She was exhausted after a long day at work and and girl guides was trying to figure out what needed to happen with the laundry
+- [ ] To get the response she did really hurt 
+- [ ] She can ask if I am good to talk after she knocks and I have both headphones over both ears
+- [ ] She felt surprised and upset by the convo in the laundry room
+- [ ] It felt things that I was listing she did wrong that made her feel blamed
+- [ ] She wished I would have asked if she was able to talk to give a lead up to the conversation 
+- [ ] She feels defeated in the response I gave when she let me know she put garbage out
+- [ ] Previously I have asked to let me know things she had done so i can appreciate it
+- [ ] It made sense to her running through the list of todo items before relaxing for the night
+- [ ] She doesn’t think of it as my job and that I didn’t do it and she appreciates when I put the garbage out
+- [ ] I have asked before for appreciation or reinforcement and last night I said I didn’t care about it (taking the garbage out)
+- [ ] A really shitty missed opportunity on my part where I could have asked where she was coming from
+- [ ] It lead to hurtful things being said by her. Things that I do efforts she has made off of things I have said I would like
+- [ ] She doesn’t appreciate me bringing up I wanted to be heard out like she was heard out about her and the texts from my mom
+- [ ] Last night I didn’t ask to share and it was an upsetting conversation 
+- [ ] If one of us feels heard outside of asking for time that’s great but at this point shouldn’t be an expectation and shouldn’t be brought up when it doesn’t happen
+- [ ] It was an unfair expectation based on circumstances last night and honestly felt like I was throwing it in her face
+- [ ] I did this for her so she does it for me and felt so shitty
+- [ ] Especially when she knows for a fact she has been bending over backwards to check in see how I’m doing listen to how I’m feeling as I have been saying I haven’t been in the best space over the last week
+- [ ] She feels she has been showing up for me but got tossed to shit last night
+- [ ] She understands it might feel real to me in that moment but it’s untrue and it hurts 
+- [ ] She is not a monster asshole who does nothing for me
+
+- [ ] Conversation in the laundry room felt abrasive and she felt trapped in there
+- [ ] Felt like I came in hot and I started unloading on her
+- [ ] She didn’t appreciate it and it didn’t feel respectful
+
+- [ ] She remembers me coming in while she was scooping litter me standing there and waiting
+
+
+Actions
+- Get a voice recorder that can last a day and transcribe all conversations
+- ask to share feelings
+- Try not to make absolute statements that are hurtful or untrue
+- Try and be kind when talking to people